Friday, May 9, 2008
Popular Mike Shannonisms
Popular Mike Shannonisms
Mike Shannon is the broadcaster for the St. Louis Cardinals. Just like Harry Caray to the north of us, we have some good ones here to laugh at.
"This big standing-room only crowd is settling into their seats."
"It's raining like a Chinese fire drill!"
(After Brian Jordan was hit by a pitch for the 4th time on a single road
trip): "Jordan must feel like a Ouija Board."
(Referring to Bernard Gilkey): "He was originally born in University
City."
"He's faster than a chicken being chased by Ronald McDonald!"
(Referring to Mike Schmidt): "the longtime, and soon-to-be,
Hall-of-Famer."
(Referring to Hideo Nomo): "He's the biggest thing to hit Japan since
they dropped the bomb on Nagashima!"
"This game is off to a rather conspicuous start, don't you think. Jack?"
"Well, folks, this game began as a tiny worm, and is blossoming into a
large cobra."
"That foul tip bounced up and caught him right in the groins...and
that'll really clear your eyes out."
"A hit up the middle right now would be like a nice ham sandwich and a
cold, frosty one."
(Broadcasting from New York under a full moon): "I wish you folks back
in St. Louis could see this moon."
(On the day before Easter): "I just want to tell everyone 'Happy Easter
and Happy Hanukkah.'"
"Things are not always as they appear to be as."
"Well, he did everything right to get ready for the throw, but if ya
ain't got the hose, the water just won't come out."
"Our next homestand follows this road trip."
(Referring to a home run by Ted Simmons): "and that's the bread on
Simmons' butter."
"The right-hander is throwing up (instead of 'up, throwing') in the
bullpen."
"I've heard it said that if you know English, Spanish, Italian, and I
think it's French, you can go just about anywhere in this world...except
China where they have all those derelicts." After a pause, Joe Buch
suggested that Mike has meant to say "dialects." Mike responded, "Yeah,
dialects! That's what I mean...but they've got a lot of derelicts too!"
"He ran to second faster than a cat in Chinatown."
"I wouldn't have see it if I hadn't believed it."
"Don't bite off your head to spite your nose."
Joe: "Mike, the Cardinals would like to welcome a group of 19 French
foreign exchange students in Section 382."
Mike: "Where're they from, Joe?"
Joe: "Uhh, France, I think."
A couple of years back, Mike and Joe were discussing the unflattering
photographs of players that had been flashed on the screen at another
ballpark. Mike's take on the quality of the photo selection was: "Some
of those guys look like the picture was taken while they were seeing
their first UFO." After several seconds of laughter, Joe added, "As
opposed to their second or third."
"The wind switched 360 degrees."
"Boy, a cold, frosty Budweiser would be great about now"...long
pause...then an "ahhh"
Mike's classic: "Ol' Abner Doubleday has done it again."
"It's raining so hard I thought it was going to stop."
"The crowd's on their feet for the Canadian Star Bangled Banner."
"Back in the day when I played, a pitcher had 3 pitches: a fastball, a
curveball, a slider, a changeup and a good sinker pitch."
Mike Shannon is the broadcaster for the St. Louis Cardinals. Just like Harry Caray to the north of us, we have some good ones here to laugh at.
"This big standing-room only crowd is settling into their seats."
"It's raining like a Chinese fire drill!"
(After Brian Jordan was hit by a pitch for the 4th time on a single road
trip): "Jordan must feel like a Ouija Board."
(Referring to Bernard Gilkey): "He was originally born in University
City."
"He's faster than a chicken being chased by Ronald McDonald!"
(Referring to Mike Schmidt): "the longtime, and soon-to-be,
Hall-of-Famer."
(Referring to Hideo Nomo): "He's the biggest thing to hit Japan since
they dropped the bomb on Nagashima!"
"This game is off to a rather conspicuous start, don't you think. Jack?"
"Well, folks, this game began as a tiny worm, and is blossoming into a
large cobra."
"That foul tip bounced up and caught him right in the groins...and
that'll really clear your eyes out."
"A hit up the middle right now would be like a nice ham sandwich and a
cold, frosty one."
(Broadcasting from New York under a full moon): "I wish you folks back
in St. Louis could see this moon."
(On the day before Easter): "I just want to tell everyone 'Happy Easter
and Happy Hanukkah.'"
"Things are not always as they appear to be as."
"Well, he did everything right to get ready for the throw, but if ya
ain't got the hose, the water just won't come out."
"Our next homestand follows this road trip."
(Referring to a home run by Ted Simmons): "and that's the bread on
Simmons' butter."
"The right-hander is throwing up (instead of 'up, throwing') in the
bullpen."
"I've heard it said that if you know English, Spanish, Italian, and I
think it's French, you can go just about anywhere in this world...except
China where they have all those derelicts." After a pause, Joe Buch
suggested that Mike has meant to say "dialects." Mike responded, "Yeah,
dialects! That's what I mean...but they've got a lot of derelicts too!"
"He ran to second faster than a cat in Chinatown."
"I wouldn't have see it if I hadn't believed it."
"Don't bite off your head to spite your nose."
Joe: "Mike, the Cardinals would like to welcome a group of 19 French
foreign exchange students in Section 382."
Mike: "Where're they from, Joe?"
Joe: "Uhh, France, I think."
A couple of years back, Mike and Joe were discussing the unflattering
photographs of players that had been flashed on the screen at another
ballpark. Mike's take on the quality of the photo selection was: "Some
of those guys look like the picture was taken while they were seeing
their first UFO." After several seconds of laughter, Joe added, "As
opposed to their second or third."
"The wind switched 360 degrees."
"Boy, a cold, frosty Budweiser would be great about now"...long
pause...then an "ahhh"
Mike's classic: "Ol' Abner Doubleday has done it again."
"It's raining so hard I thought it was going to stop."
"The crowd's on their feet for the Canadian Star Bangled Banner."
"Back in the day when I played, a pitcher had 3 pitches: a fastball, a
curveball, a slider, a changeup and a good sinker pitch."
Happy Stimulus Day
The next time you check you bank account, you may be $600-1800 richer on average. That is, unless your name is Duggar. They might tap out at $6300. I hope some of it goes to getting nip/tucked.
Bad joke - could you imagine the child support check? Definitely cheaper to keep her on this one.
Bad joke - could you imagine the child support check? Definitely cheaper to keep her on this one.
Wake Up....Friday May 9th, 2008
What you missed while you were sleeping.
NEWS
The people devastated by the cyclone in Burma (Myanmar) are refused foreign aid today due to a political holiday. Therefore, no government officials will be manning the phones all weekend. They must have read the FEMA guide to rescue.
Speaking of Katrina....a bitter sweet ending or just one lucky bastard. Don't blow it in one place. I envy you.
Everythings bigger in Texas...even potholes.
Finally, Congress wants to tackle some of the real issues facing our youth today.
Looking for a TV? How about a phone? Or vacation spot?
Not happy with your appearance? Grab life by the balls....or just surround yourself with ugly people.
SPORTS
Spurs over Hornets. But if you missed it, you missed to of the best PG's in the league battling like two dudes at the playground. The last 3 minutes of the game after it was out of reach, they didn't even consider passing. Series Hornets 2-1.
Celtics over Lebron. I say versus Lebron because he is a one man show. Sure he is shooting horrendous, but it is 4 people guarding him. Cavs better invest in Agent Zero or King James will be opening up for Jay-Z on tour.
Now I have seen declaring early...but this early? There has to be some kind of reverse age discrimination going on.
And for entertainment news:
I might have to get HBO and some popcorn. Hard Knocks will be showcasing the Boys'.
NEWS
The people devastated by the cyclone in Burma (Myanmar) are refused foreign aid today due to a political holiday. Therefore, no government officials will be manning the phones all weekend. They must have read the FEMA guide to rescue.
Speaking of Katrina....a bitter sweet ending or just one lucky bastard. Don't blow it in one place. I envy you.
Everythings bigger in Texas...even potholes.
Finally, Congress wants to tackle some of the real issues facing our youth today.
Looking for a TV? How about a phone? Or vacation spot?
Not happy with your appearance? Grab life by the balls....or just surround yourself with ugly people.
SPORTS
Spurs over Hornets. But if you missed it, you missed to of the best PG's in the league battling like two dudes at the playground. The last 3 minutes of the game after it was out of reach, they didn't even consider passing. Series Hornets 2-1.
Celtics over Lebron. I say versus Lebron because he is a one man show. Sure he is shooting horrendous, but it is 4 people guarding him. Cavs better invest in Agent Zero or King James will be opening up for Jay-Z on tour.
Now I have seen declaring early...but this early? There has to be some kind of reverse age discrimination going on.
And for entertainment news:
I might have to get HBO and some popcorn. Hard Knocks will be showcasing the Boys'.
Why have a blog if....
You can't promote yourself, family or friends? How about if you looking for this? Or coming soon? And for the lover's out there? New music?
As you can see I have a wide variety of friends.
As you can see I have a wide variety of friends.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Aide says Obama plans to declare victory on May 20
Will she just give up? According to CNN, the counts look like this:
Democrats » TOTAL DELEGATES
Barack Obama
Pledged: 1,588 Superdelegates 257 Total: 1,845
Hillary Clinton
Pledged: 1,419 Superdelegates 267 Total: 1,686
Election Center » Needed to Win: 2,025
It is almost impossible to even steal the nomination at this point. Or does Hilary have a hidden agenda?
Click Here to Read: Highlights:
Not long after the polls close in the May 20 Kentucky and Oregon primaries, Barack Obama plans to declare victory in his bid for the Democratic presidential nomination.
And, until at least May 31 and perhaps longer, Hillary Clinton's campaign plans to dispute it.
Democrats » TOTAL DELEGATES
Barack Obama
Pledged: 1,588 Superdelegates 257 Total: 1,845
Hillary Clinton
Pledged: 1,419 Superdelegates 267 Total: 1,686
Election Center » Needed to Win: 2,025
It is almost impossible to even steal the nomination at this point. Or does Hilary have a hidden agenda?
Click Here to Read: Highlights:
Not long after the polls close in the May 20 Kentucky and Oregon primaries, Barack Obama plans to declare victory in his bid for the Democratic presidential nomination.
And, until at least May 31 and perhaps longer, Hillary Clinton's campaign plans to dispute it.
NBA Draft Update
The steal of the draft.
http://www.draftfeinstein.com/index.php
Be sure to check out the stats and scouting report.
http://www.draftfeinstein.com/index.php
Be sure to check out the stats and scouting report.
Philly Cops go Psuedo-Rodney King on 3 Suspects
Six fraternities suspended after San Diego drug bust
Six fraternities suspended after San Diego drug bust
Story Highlights
96 people, including 75 students, arrested in San Diego drug sweep
Police say some fraternity members openly dealt drugs, text-messaged customers
2 kilograms of cocaine, Ecstasy, marijuana, meth, guns seized in raids
One arrested student was about to get degree in criminal justice
Story Highlights
96 people, including 75 students, arrested in San Diego drug sweep
Police say some fraternity members openly dealt drugs, text-messaged customers
2 kilograms of cocaine, Ecstasy, marijuana, meth, guns seized in raids
One arrested student was about to get degree in criminal justice
NCAA Football 09
Release date July 15th. Get your beer bongs ready like Pyscho T.
Key Features: Online dynasty up to 60 years (no modified rosters though), Alternate Uniforms, "Supposedly better" running game.
Key Features: Online dynasty up to 60 years (no modified rosters though), Alternate Uniforms, "Supposedly better" running game.
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