NBA SEASON KICKS OFF TONIGHT

Yeah, I stole their picture. Thats on ESPN right now. Above, you are looking at the ideal NBA Eastern Conference Finals. You have the former Big 3 vs Team John Dillinger. Shaq and Rondo vs Pat Riley's hair. South Beach vs Noreasters. There is only one problem with this scenario, it has to play 82 games and make it through the season.

I believe this matchup takes place in May unless the following things happen:

1. Carmelo and Chris Paul/Tony Parker are traded to the Knicks. This does not put them in the driver's seat either, but a Run and Gun Knick team lead by LaLa's man and Amare would pose some severe health issues to everyone on the Celtics sans Rondo. Shout out to LaLa. I see you ma.

2. Stan Van Gundy - Can Stan be the man that Riley thought he would be? Can he edit Dwight Howard's post scoring and offensive awareness ratings on NBA Elite to boost him to top 5 in the game? Does Vince Carter pull a Vince Carter? Better yet, can he get out of the way and let JJ and French Connection UK step into the lineup for good?

3. What about Utah Midwest - Is DRose an upgrade or downgrade of Deron Williams for this same supporting cast? Is Tom Thibodeaux exposed as a new coach or prove that he was the architect of the most recent Boston glory days? Do you get rid of Joakim Noah for Melo and is that a good move to begin with? I say no. 

4. Realignment - Seeing that you could probably win 33 games and make the playoffs in the East, how do you stay focused night in and night out to get better when you playing the Nets, Pacers, or Pistons?

5. Injuries. Not ones caused by helmet to helmet contact, but just natural injuries. Carlos Boozer fell walking up the stairs last month. Mike Miller messed up his hand throwing money at King of Diamonds last Wednesday night after a night on the town with Rick Ross. Injuries happen. I think Miami would be able to withstand some injuries due to Wade and LeBron used to playing by themselves anyway. Boston on the other hand, they are a Rondo ankle roll away from being swept in first round. 

I'll tell you one thing, loved the new LeBron commercial. Especially when he eats the cupcake and gives a shout out.

NBA Preseason Awards

Some of what you are used to, others....not so much. Let's get into it.

MVP - Split MVP between Durant and the new forgotten star, Kobe. It can't be DWade or LeBron unless they split the award and that wont happen unless they win 75 games. Durant, aka Dookie from the Wire, has the image the NBA wants right now. I think this will be the last hooray for Kobe. The Lakers will more than likely have the best record in the West and Kobe being the best player on the team....well you see where I'm going.
Defensive POY - LeBron James - He has everything to prove. Remember he was 2nd to Howard last year. Playing in an uptempo style where he can be the rover....look the F@()k out. Sleeper - Serge Ibaka, OKC. I know most people have never heard of him, but this cat is legit. Will probably lead the league in blocks.
Best Wing Man - Delonte West. Not on the court but wouldn't you love to go out hanging with Delonte as long as he took his medicine? You never know if you gonna end up at some over 40 club or in the streets, but you know you gonna have some stories to tell.
Rookie of Year - John Wall for one simple reason, Blake Griffin is gonna get hurt. He jumps around like he just realized he has legs. Wall is gonna lead the Wiz to the playoffs, not a drastic feat since it will only be about 35 wins. If Blake doesn't get hurt and Baron Davis shows up to work, Blake could get it done. Check the video for highlights 5 and 7.

Sixth Man - JJ Redick - He will get more looks this year. He is a dead eye shooter and surprisely, he has gotten better every year.
Most Improved - Darren Collison. He almost made people forget about Chris Paul in New Orleans for a minute.
Biggest Surprise - Gilbert Arenas - he doesn't have to handle the ball anymore. Agent Zero gets to play off the ball with Wall running through opposing defenders in the lane. Is there a scarier image than Arenas running trailer on a Wall fast break to the 3pt line?
Not So Surprising - Greg Oden gets hurt. Melo gets traded. Tim Duncan retires.
First Team - Howard, Dookie, LeBron, Wade, Kobe
Second Team - Amare, Pau Gasol, Deron Williams, Joe Johnson, Carmelo
Third Team - Al Jefferson, Chris Paul, Monta Ellis, Bosh,

This almost beats the sham-wow commercial.
A few comments:
Where has the musical talent gone?
Does this qualify as entertainment now?
Is this a joke or was this guy seriously trying to do something?
Why?