Monday, December 20, 2010

Christmas Heat Wave


Ask yourself a question....
Self....Yessum....
Do you love Christmas time?....No not really, I spend a lot of money I don't have for no apparent reason to please a few other people and get some emotional boost from seeing them happy.
Self, you are rambling again......Ok. Sorry short answer is yes, Christmas is cool.
What if I told you the Miami Heat play LA Lakers, Orlando Magic plays the Boston Celtics on Christmas?.....I would tell you my wife and kids will not be too happy with me.
What if I told you that action actually starts off with the newlook New York Knicks vs the Baby Bulls followed up with Dookie Durant vs Denver Nuggets.....Do you know a good divorce lawyer...I might need one?

Following subplots
Miami Heat, media conglomerate and summertime news makers, ride their 12 game winning streak and possibly 14 game winning streak into Kobe Bryant and the two-time defending Champs LA Lakers in Los Angeles. This game has been circled on both team's calendars. For Miami, this is the ultimate litmus test, can you beat the champs in a big game? For LA, this is the statement game of I don't care who signed this summer, the title goes through LA. The best player in the game goes against the next 2 best players. The best big man in the West vs the worst frontline assembled since Vietnam.

Orlando fired more people this week than Washington Redskins. Look at these salaries and tell me which team is Orlando:
Team A

Player 1 - $18.8 mill
Player 2 - $13.5 mill
Player 3 - $11.8 mill
Player 4 - $8.4 mill
Team B

Player 1 - $17.7 mill
Player 2 - $14.4 mill
Player 3 - $10.2 mill
Player 4 - $16.6 mill

You guessed it, team B is Orlando with Arenas, JRich, Turkoglu, and Howard respectively. Can you name Team A? Does it look like Miami didn't spend their money wisely this summer? They got LeBron, Wade, Bost for $14.5/each.  I'm just saying. You can't cry foul and claim you thought guys were more "competitive" or whatever and then go out and follow the mold. Meanwhile Boston is riding a 13 game streak of their own, and you bets believe they want to prove that they are still the best Big 3 and 1 in the league.

Team A - San Antonio Spurs - Duncan, Parker, Ginobili, Richard Jefferson.

NFL Quick note: DeSean Jackson just reached Primetime level of do not kick the ball to him at any point in the game status.


Thursday, December 2, 2010

Cleveland ROCKS

He think he Big Meach
Larry Hoover
Whippin Work
Hallejuah

He MC Hammer.
I wish LeBron the best tonight. I have 3 scenarios for how the game will probably play out.
Scenario 1
LeBron goes Kobe on the Cavs. 81 pts. Fire from every angle to the point where after he dunks on Jamarrio Moon or JJ Hickson. Or maybe he can poster Anderson Varejao like this....
If he doesn't go for 81, slight exaggeration, I really expect him to go for 40pts and triple double.

Scenario 2
DWade carries the load and LeBron plays clean up. I am sure LB is going to have some pregame jitters. Its hard to spot a sniper in a crowded arena I've heard. So after the initial tip and hoopla has calmed down and LB finally hits a few shots, gets to the line to the biggest chants below, it will be an orchestrated blow out by DWade.

Scenario 3
LeBron sticks the place out and Cleveland sticks around late enough in the game to make it enjoyable. We know Miami is going to do everything humanly possible to get LeBron the ball early and often. But LeBron has put up some stink bomb games before. Let's say Cleveland gets hot from outside with Boobie and Mo, then what? DWade is not himself, Spice Bosh is on the trading block for a real superstar, and LeBron has probably received so much hate mail this week, his nerves might not be able to handle this situation. How about my main man Big Z coming through down the stretch with his 15 ft corner jumper? That would be pretty damn funny.

Here is the official play by play orchestrated chants for tonights game.
Brought to you by the fans of Cleveland of course....http://cavschants.wordpress.com/chant-sheet/

Introductions;
Wade – Boo
Bosh- Boo
Arroyo – Boo
Z – (We’d encourage Cheering)
LeBron – Laugh as loud as you can

12:00-6:00 1st Quarter
Whenever LeBron has the ball or is at the free throw line the
chant is:
NO-Ring-King (To the beat of “Lets-Go-Cavs”)

6:00-0:00 1st Quarter
Whenever LeBron has the ball or is at the free throw line the
chant is:
Ak-Ron Hates-You (Clap, Clap, ClapClapClap)

12:00-6:00 2nd Quarter
Whenever LeBron has the ball or is at the free throw line the
chant is:
Wit-Nessed Noth-Ing (Clap, Clap, ClapClapClap)

6:00-0:00 2nd Quarter
Whenever LeBron has the ball or is at the free throw line the
chant is:
Sideeeee-Kick Sideeee-Kick (No Claps, derisive singing)

Start of Third Quarter
To the tune of “My Country Tis of Thee”
Our King he betrayed Thee
Couldn’t play any ‘D’
He has no RING!
Playoffs He Barely Tried
Embarassed Akrons Pride
No Doubt he really lied
He HAS NO RING!
(Repeat as Necessary)

12:00-6:00 3rd Quarter
Whenever LeBron has the ball or is at the free throw line the
chant is:
Scott-ie Pip-pen (Clap, Clap, ClapClapClap) Apologies to Pip

6:00-0:00 3rd Quarter
Whenever LeBron has the ball or is at the free throw line the
chant is:
Traiiii-tor Traiiii-tor (No Claps, Derisive Singing)

12:00-6:00 4th Quarter
Whenever LeBron has the ball or is at the free throw line the
chant is:
De-Lon-Te! De-Lon-Te! (To the beat of “Lets-Go-Cavs”)

6:00-0:00 4th Quarter
Throughout the last half of the Fourth Quarter:
Cleve-land Rocks!
Cleve-land Rocks!
Show your civic pride, make Cleveland Proud!

Monday, November 15, 2010

Run Floyd Run: Pacman is the Best

“I don’t know how you all see it, but when it comes to the children, Wu-Tang is for the children. We teach the children. You know what I mean? Puffy is good, but Wu-Tang is the best, Okay? I want you all to know that this is Ol’ Dirty Bastard, and I love you all. Peace!”


That pretty much sums up how I feel about Manny Pacquiao and Floyd Mayweather Jr.  Manny is for the children. He is there to teach the children how to dish out punishment in a classy manor. Manny pretty much stop fighting after his most recent foe, Antonio Margarito had his face look like this:


Manny was looking at the ref asking why they wanted him to keep destroying Margarito.  The answer was clear - Margarito is one tough MF + he's Mexican = Fight to the death. Freddie Roach would have had to put in a Mortal Kombat Finish Him code for Pacman to try to put the 165lbs Margarito down. Say what you want to say about Margarito and his plaster hands, he put up about as valiant an effort somebody could possibly have while getting the beat down of the year. 


What does this mean for Floyd? At first I found myself taking jabs at Floyd and saying he is scared and the such. I have to retract my statements. I have come to my senses. Floyd is brilliant. Floyd is revolutionary. And beyond that, he is scared for the right reasons. Why would you subject yourself to this type of punishment?



Or what about this? Who wants to sleep in the ring at night? 


Pacman is special. Extremely gifted. And the best boxer I have seen in my young life. He has the ferociousness of a young Tyson with the flare of a young Roy Jones Jr. Factor in the humbleness of a nerd, there is  no way I would want to fight this guy. Poor Ricky Hatton was never the same. Hatton had his life fall apart after this episode, lost his family, and is now in rehab. I can't blame Ricky. I have never been in the fight with a crazed Spyder Monkey and the lasting effects have to be unrecoverable.  


For the fight that we will never see, I still contend it wont be a walk in the park for either fighter. I maintain that Pacman would have to bring the same A game that Floyd would need. But I still believe Floyd has not seen this level of talent and a person who is as fast (or faster) and stronger (way stronger, drugs or not) and for 12 rounds. Pacman doesn't get tired. He is vulnerable, he did admit that Margarito hurt him. Margarito was catching him on a number of shots the entire fight, but the flash and flare of Pacman made you forget about them instantly.  As far as the testing, lets put the BS aside and make the fight the last 7,000 fights have been made prior to the Mayweather Keep Boxing Clean campaign aka the Tea Party Bullshit of America campaign for boxing.  Pacman a rare talent that needs to walk through one more door of greatness. 


Now watch this teashot. This is one hell of a car.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Cleveland Responds to Lebron



How is the saying....

Hell has no fury like a woman scorned

Cleveland is still taking shots at the throne. Save this date.
Thu, Dec 28:00 PMTNT
My early prediction is that LeBron goes for 50. 

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

NBA Week One Wrap, Favre Limps Out, Moss Flashes

This was a sad scene from the Vikes game. I really felt bad for old man winter. Up until this point, Favre had a good game, 22-32 for 259 yds and a not his fault pick. If It wasnt for a clear pass interference on a Randy Moss TD, this would have been a different game. But instead Favre got chin checked, Randy Moss got waived, and Adrian Peterson got Tavaris Jackson to look forward to next year.

Speaking of Moss - Did Randy lose a step or do teams not even let him get going? Does he still pose that deep threat that he did in 2007 or is it the mystique? Not taking a swipe at Moss which I love, but is their any debate anymore of which "diva" WR you would want this late in there career: Moss or TO? Hands down, TO is showing that he still has "it" and he runs all the routes, but he doesn't make slot WR better like Moss. Pick your poison.

Around the NFL - McNabb is headed to free agency and a possible stint at Oakland County Jail (with the new look Raiders). Is Jamarcus Russell the answer in Washington....really? Can we give Raheem Morris coach of the year for the 5-2 Bucs even though they havent beat one team with a winning record? It still is much better than year's past. The Bucs probably have the easiest schedule in the league and are headed to a first round exit in the playoffs. Dallas is done.

NBA Week 1 Recap - The Lakers....well are still the team to beat. Dwight Howard has some post moves, but does that hurt the overall team scope of Orlando where the shooters need touches just as much as Howard does now? The Heat are one hell of a work in progress. Despite losing the biggest opening season game in league history, they have bounced back nicely. Monta Ellis and the Warriors might lead the league in scoring and defensive pts allowed. Blake Griffin is going to lead the league in freakishly amazingly scary OMG WTF moments this year.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

NBA SEASON KICKS OFF TONIGHT


Yeah, I stole their picture. Thats on ESPN right now. Above, you are looking at the ideal NBA Eastern Conference Finals. You have the former Big 3 vs Team John Dillinger. Shaq and Rondo vs Pat Riley's hair. South Beach vs Noreasters. There is only one problem with this scenario, it has to play 82 games and make it through the season.

I believe this matchup takes place in May unless the following things happen:
1. Carmelo and Chris Paul/Tony Parker are traded to the Knicks. This does not put them in the driver's seat either, but a Run and Gun Knick team lead by LaLa's man and Amare would pose some severe health issues to everyone on the Celtics sans Rondo. Shout out to LaLa. I see you ma.
2. Stan Van Gundy - Can Stan be the man that Riley thought he would be? Can he edit Dwight Howard's post scoring and offensive awareness ratings on NBA Elite to boost him to top 5 in the game? Does Vince Carter pull a Vince Carter? Better yet, can he get out of the way and let JJ and French Connection UK step into the lineup for good?
3. What about Utah Midwest - Is DRose an upgrade or downgrade of Deron Williams for this same supporting cast? Is Tom Thibodeaux exposed as a new coach or prove that he was the architect of the most recent Boston glory days? Do you get rid of Joakim Noah for Melo and is that a good move to begin with? I say no. 
4. Realignment - Seeing that you could probably win 33 games and make the playoffs in the East, how do you stay focused night in and night out to get better when you playing the Nets, Pacers, or Pistons?
5. Injuries. Not ones caused by helmet to helmet contact, but just natural injuries. Carlos Boozer fell walking up the stairs last month. Mike Miller messed up his hand throwing money at King of Diamonds last Wednesday night after a night on the town with Rick Ross. Injuries happen. I think Miami would be able to withstand some injuries due to Wade and LeBron used to playing by themselves anyway. Boston on the other hand, they are a Rondo ankle roll away from being swept in first round. 

I'll tell you one thing, loved the new LeBron commercial. Especially when he eats the cupcake and gives a shout out.

NBA Preseason Awards

Some of what you are used to, others....not so much. Let's get into it.

MVP - Split MVP between Durant and the new forgotten star, Kobe. It can't be DWade or LeBron unless they split the award and that wont happen unless they win 75 games. Durant, aka Dookie from the Wire, has the image the NBA wants right now. I think this will be the last hooray for Kobe. The Lakers will more than likely have the best record in the West and Kobe being the best player on the team....well you see where I'm going.
Defensive POY - LeBron James - He has everything to prove. Remember he was 2nd to Howard last year. Playing in an uptempo style where he can be the rover....look the F@()k out. Sleeper - Serge Ibaka, OKC. I know most people have never heard of him, but this cat is legit. Will probably lead the league in blocks.
Best Wing Man - Delonte West. Not on the court but wouldn't you love to go out hanging with Delonte as long as he took his medicine? You never know if you gonna end up at some over 40 club or in the streets, but you know you gonna have some stories to tell.
Rookie of Year - John Wall for one simple reason, Blake Griffin is gonna get hurt. He jumps around like he just realized he has legs. Wall is gonna lead the Wiz to the playoffs, not a drastic feat since it will only be about 35 wins. If Blake doesn't get hurt and Baron Davis shows up to work, Blake could get it done. Check the video for highlights 5 and 7.

Sixth Man - JJ Redick - He will get more looks this year. He is a dead eye shooter and surprisely, he has gotten better every year.
Most Improved - Darren Collison. He almost made people forget about Chris Paul in New Orleans for a minute.
Biggest Surprise - Gilbert Arenas - he doesn't have to handle the ball anymore. Agent Zero gets to play off the ball with Wall running through opposing defenders in the lane. Is there a scarier image than Arenas running trailer on a Wall fast break to the 3pt line?
Not So Surprising - Greg Oden gets hurt. Melo gets traded. Tim Duncan retires.
First Team - Howard, Dookie, LeBron, Wade, Kobe
Second Team - Amare, Pau Gasol, Deron Williams, Joe Johnson, Carmelo
Third Team - Al Jefferson, Chris Paul, Monta Ellis, Bosh,


This almost beats the sham-wow commercial.
A few comments:
Where has the musical talent gone?
Does this qualify as entertainment now?
Is this a joke or was this guy seriously trying to do something?
Why?

Friday, July 9, 2010

Stop the Madness: I Would Have Left Cleveland Too

Let this be a disclaimer: I have never been to Ohio, let alone Cleveland. I am not a professional athlete nor do I play one on a Tyler Perry show (no homo). That doesn't mean that the Summer of 2010 doesn't effect me. I'm a fan just like you, in a city that doesn't even have a pro team.


Let's start with the facts:

  1. LeBron James is arguably one of the best 5 players in the league. Hands down. No matter where you rank him, he can't fall lower than 5. 
  2. DWade is in the same category. 
  3. Bosh - not so much, but still an All-Star for what its worth and very talented. We can all agree Bosh is at least one of the top 10-15 PF/C in the league. 
  4. Every team in the league was trying to coax these guys into signing with their perspective teams, and rightfully so. Teams (Miami, NY, NJ, Chicago, Clippers, etc) virtually cut their entire rosters to shreds preparing for this summer two years ago.
Hey Cleveland....Stay classy.

Blame Cleveland. Cleveland did nothing to get better.  No coach. Mike Brown couldn't coach a HS team. No good players. Shaq - Hurts LeBron's ability to run. Jamison - he is who we thought he is. No young talent. No swinging for the fences free agency moves. Just simply the comfort that Delonte West would be there to leave the light on and the toilet seat up.  They played the home is where the heart is card. Bullshit. You ever been to Miami? Ever been to Florida? Stacks up pretty good to Cleveland Ohio doesn't it? Case adjourned.

LeBron - Greatness or Ultimate Teammate?
Remember when people questioned Kobe's willingness to pass the ball or trust his teammates? No...doesn't ring a bell? Or the time he wanted out of LA? Yeah - winning silences the ghosts of Christmas past doesnt it? Kobe didn't exactly campaign to get LeBron type help, but remember LA almost landed KG, and instead got Gasol. Good consolation prize huh? Once marveled at how great a teammate he was, now LeBron is the poster child for "Can't Get it Done By Himself."  My thoughts and hopefully LeBrons thoughts on that - who gives a SHIT? When did doing it by myself become the measure by which it gets done? Last time I checked, this wasn't tennis or golf, it is a team sport. I hope LeBron averages a triple double this year, which is very possible since he will have at least 2 people that can hit a shot. 

Get my Steven A. Smith on...
The fact of the matter is James, Bosh, and DWade are going to be exciting no matter how you slice it and no matter who signs for the league mininum to be on South Beach.  I still don't believe they are the best team in the league, maybe not in their own state. They have to fill out the roster, I'm not worried about playing together, they did that for a few years with the Olympics.  That being said, the East still runs through Boston, Orlando, and maybe Chicago. Teams are not just going to lay down since the Voltrons united. James did a crazy unprecedented feat by broadcasting where he signs and he did it on his terms. He signed for less money. No one commending him for that? Big friggin deal he did it on live TV. I'll let Spike sum that up. How is that different from ESPN broadcasting and having a "Sunday Conversation" on why he didnt stay in Cleveland like the olden days? The difference is nobody can wait that long anymore. People have to have the information like yesterday. Cameras have been following these guys almost as close as Brett Favre. Yeah Brett Favre - the guy we get updates that he cut his grass and had a slight limp or hurt his shoulder turning the pickle jar. Was it a good/bad decision? Nobody can answer that for the next 10 years or so, and even then their is no definitive answer. Was there a guarantee that he would win with Bulls/Knicks/Cavs? Hell no. That is what this is about right....winning? Or is this about loyalty? Loyalty to what...city of Cleveland? He was a free agent. Free agent - meaning the ability to freely sign with any other team. To Cavs organization and their out of the closet crazy owner?  Cavs new slogan "All for one and one for all"....what is this the YMCA 12 year old league? Dude is off his rocker and smokin wit cigawetts if he thinks Cavs are going to win before LeBron, especially after you try to throw the biggest star in the game under the bus. Cry me a river and go to hell and build a snowman because that ain't happening. But what does he owe Cleveland? Sure the fans are pissed - rightfully so - but come on son, ask yourself if you would have stayed? 

One thing is for sure....if they win the Championship together...that will be a hard decision on the MVP trophy.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

To leave or not to leave.....

This NBA free agent class is one of the best in recent history. I can think of another year when so many valuable individuals had the ability to control their own destiny..... Until now.... But who goes where??
1.) LeBron James (26 years old) - how can you not go after Bron Bron if you are the Nets, Knicks, and other teams with alot of space and nothing to loose. Hell, put him with some more than average players and make sure they stay away from his moms......that is pretty much the recipe. The most dominant player in the league. I say Lebron will either stay or go to Chicago and keep riding his MJ high.

2.) Dwayne Wade (28) - in my opinion is the most complete player in the league next to Kobe Bryant. But as long as LeBron is linked with him, Wade will stay at #2. Wade will NOT by any means leave South Beach. For what reason should he? He has his own team, beautiful weather, beautiful women, and women who look ten times better than his own wife. I think the bigger question is who will join him? He is in need of a Big man, and a good set shooter. All of the other role players are in place already. Besides the combination that will destroy every franchise for years to come would be the devastating combo of #1 James and #2 Wade. And this would be good for sports!!!

3.) Chris Bosh (26) - Is one of the Best big men in the game. He averaged 22 and 8.7 over the last four seasons. Last year he chose to put up dominant numbers putting himself on display with 28.9 and 11.5 a game. Will Bosh even leave? Raptors showed they will spend money by bringing in Hedo Turkoglu to go with an emerging Calderon and Bargnani. With a couple more pieces this could be a good team in the future. If not im sure that any team with cap space will be willing to take the young fella.GUARANTEED Hell... he would look very good in purple and gold...

4.) Dirk Nowitzki ( 32) Well he averaged 26 and 9 a game this past season. This season also showed that even bringing in role players didnt help. It is time D
irk linked up with a player better than himself because it is obvious he does not have what it takes to get to the promise land.... It will be hard for him to brake away from that Maverick rope Cuban tied him in. I was just thinking to myself... they could be gay. What do yall think??????

5.) Joe Johnson (29) Boy got some game on him!!!! 39% three point shooter as well and very active with assists and boards. He will have high value this off season and will more than likely leave Atlanta. That is if he wants to win someday. He could be that piece LeBron or Wade needs. Maybe him and Bosh would be the new Pat Ewing and Alan Houston?? He is another player who needs someone better than him on his squad.

other notables:
Amare Stoudamire - unimpressive postseason for a top big man and someone wanting top pay.
Carlos Boozer - consistent and underrated. alot of injury issues as well but I like his toughness
Paul Pierce - he still got it.
Manu Ginobli - he came back in rare form. it is his time to get out of San An. and go shine elsewhere

David Lee - Give him the money he deserves. A great complimentary Big man to anyone

Yao Ming - The Chinese tried and hope fully no more experiments from them. this didnt work
Michael Redd - He fell off helllllllla hard.
Ray Allen - he hits threes, but will give you not
hing else at all. so just imagine when he is having an off day? You are better off picking the less expensive version of this Ray Allen like.... JJ Reddick or Kapono.

http://espn.go.com/nba/features/freeagentslotmachine

Video of the Day - So St. Louis

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

You know you da ishh......

When you have been out of the game for 10 years and still making the cover of everything. Word on the street is Mr. Jordan will grace the cover of NBA2K 11. Since I"m back on my bball skills after a layoff since NBA Live 04, I am feeling the 2k series. It looks good, plays smooth and Career mode is helllllaaa fun. Taking your guy from the DLeague to the All-Star Game takes work, not just creating your player as a 90 out the gate. You really have to start at the ground up, a 40 rating. No jumper, no hops, no handles. Anyhooo, Jordan is a natural fit for 2K. He already has some sponsorship in the game, the Jordan Player of the Game, etc. Isn't it crazy that MJ never landed on a cover? Bulls vs Lakers ...nope, Bulls vs Blazers ...nope, NBA Showdown, try again. Remember you used to have to play with Player 99 that was Bald and Overall 99 rating? We know MJ is all about winning and his percentage, funny how time and money cures all. Now only if they can fix the NCAA games and put the names on their and pay these "amatuers" farely.

Which MJ moment should be the cover? I say just the Jordan emblem, but if they put a basketball moment, here are my top 5.
Old School...Where the legend begins.

Where he defied gravity....
A champion...
Ooo....sooo pretty....

CLASSIC


In other news NBA Live is going to be NBA Elite from now on.

SHE - amERICan Beauty

Beauty in life is what we make of it. I would like to present an element of beauty through my own interpretation. Hope you enjoy.......SHE - amERICan Beauty

the SHE collection: Round da way




Songs of Liberation pt1 & 2


Aqua Berry

Beauty is..... defined


Beauty of Life (Dorthy)




Beauty Hills

ebizz6284@gmail.com

Friday, February 12, 2010

Valentine's Day Special: Have Better Sext: A User's Guide


With V-Day right around the corner, maybe a little warm up session is needed. I changed the picture, I like this one better.

Have Better Sext: A User's Guide

So you've finally discovered that your phone is more than just a device for making calls and playing Flight Navigator—that it can actually be used to enhance your sex life through a nifty little thing called "sexting."
Well, congratulations (and welcome to the 21st century). But don't be fooled: sexting mayseem easy, but it's actually a complicated dance of dirty words, innuendo, and, of course, hilariously unintentional misspellings (this is text messaging we're talking about). But with a little help, you'll be on your way to sexting like a pro. Read on and learn.
Sexting for Foreplay vs. Sexting as a Main Course. One of the first things to decide is whether your amorous texts are intended as the lead in to something in the flesh, or if they're intended as an end unto themselves. It may seem like a trivial distinction, but it's actually a key point to determining your sexting style.
If you're sexting for foreplay. The key here is to keep it light, and focus on the teasing—remember, you're trying to build excitement for what's to come, not blow your load on the spot. "I'm so hot for you," "I can't believe how wet my pussy is," flirty pictures, and the like are all ideal. Getting into too much detail, however, is not. Sure, you may be planning on covering your lover in peanut butter and licking it off of his or her body, then dousing their body in chocolate sauce and making sweet, sweet, messy love—but laying that all out on the front line builds up an expectation that may not be fulfilled (that, and typing all that out will make your thumbs prematurely tired).
If you're sexting as an end unto itself. In this situation, sexting becomes like phone sex or cybersex (but with texts!): it's intended as a simulation of the sexual act itself. Since you don't have to save your energy for anything else, feel free to go all out—but again, try not to blow your load all at once. The best sexual experiences build slowly: start with teasing, and when you're both good and ready, then you can whip out the chocolate and peanut butter covered sexing (if, you know, that's what you're into).
Text vs. Pictures. It's also important to decide whether your sexts are going to be primarily pictures, primarily text, or a mixture of both. Each medium has its strengths (and weaknesses)—it's up to you to decide which works best for your purposes.
Text sex. The merits of text are pretty obvious: it's oh so easy to say what you want (even if it's a little annoying to type it all out on a tiny keyboard). Text allows you the freedom to let your imagination run wild, and explore your wildest fantasies (in 160 characters or less, of course).
· Make it personal. As with all tech (and sex) experiences, customization is key. A generic message will only get you so far; if you manage to slip in an added, personalized detail, it's that much hotter.
· For the love of god, spell correctly. You're not fifteen (and if you are, close this window and go study for your chemistry exam). While some abbreviations may be necessary (especially in a detailed fantasy), the less you use, the better. "I wnt u 2 suk my cok" just isn't as hot. (Arousal-induced typos, on the other hand, are acceptable—and, for that matter, to be expected.)
· No emoticons. You can maybe get away with a sly ;), but beyond that, there's no such thing as a sexy emoticon.
Pictures. A picture is worth a thousand words, right? Photos may not allow you the same level of directness, but they do offer an added level of, ahem, stimulation. If you've decided to illustrate your sexts, here are a few things to keep in mind.
· To anonymize or no? If you're sending out sexy pictures of yourself, it's best to assume that they will one day be released to the public. Even if they're being sent to the most trusted of trusted partners, there's still the chance that you, yourself, will fuck up and manage to leak them. So if you care at all about protecting your identity, it's probably best to crop out your face (not that that's foolproof—just ask Rihanna). However, a faceless body shot is, of course, less alluring than one that hasn't been decapitated—so if you're ready to throw caution to the wind, include your face, reputation be damned.
· Hit them with your best shot. Chances are, you're taking these pictures by yourself, with a cell phone camera, so they're not going to be the best quality ever. However, that's no reason to just send whatever your camera manages to snap. A bad picture can ruin the mood—so pay attention to angles, lighting, and be sure to screen before you hit send.
· A word on up close genital shots. Genitals are wonderful, magical sources of pleasure, and they are, of course, beautiful in their own way. However, up close shots of genitals are not always the more aesthetically pleasing things, and should not be sent right out the gate—in fact, in many cases, should not be sent unless your partner specifically asks for them. (This goes doubly for the men: please don't assume that the ladies are itching to see a picture of your cock—unless, of course, they ask for it.)
Pictures with text. Most providers will allow you to append a text message along with your picture—this is obviously the best of both worlds. If you go this route, feel free to get creative. "I want you to lick me here" combined with a picture of your nipples? Extra arousing.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Thickness....Oh Wait...Wrong Email




1. Colts/Jets?
Ebizz: Im goin to stick with the Jets to upset. The Colts having defense that is good enough to put Manning in position to make great plays.  Yet, their defense is not the best in the NFL. So they are bound to give up some plays.  If you think Revis is the only threat the Jets have, apparently you have not watches any games. point blank.


DProfessor: This is too easy. The Colts are tough on D playing against a one-dimensional team. Sure the Jets play great defense, and run REALLY good. But you have to score more than 10 pts offensively to beat the Colts. Revis is great, but he can't guard 3 people at once. Colts 27 - Jets 13.

2. Saints/Vikes?


DProfessor: Ahhh.....one for the ages. This is like the USC/Texas game back with Vince Young and Reggie Bush. You know their are going to be some points put up in this one. AP has yet to get going, and who's to say that Brett wants him to do so? Brett wants to air that ball out and sling it all over the field. The problem is that the Saints do that better than any team in the league. The last team with the ball wins. Bottom line. Saints 41 Vikes 38.
Ebizz: Stop changing your mind. Im going with my Vikings in this one. Super Bowl winners............

3. Super Bowl Pick?

DProfessor: It's easy for me. The Colts. They have been the most consistent team all year....hence going 14-0 before shutting it down for the playoffs. Sure, call me a homer...but who else can win the tough games? All of the Vikes big wins have been blowouts, the losses, close. Same for the Aints. I'm taking the Colts and of course, MVP goes to the White QB...barring a 8 sack performance from Freeney.


Ebizz: So you must have not seen the Vikings vs the 49ers this year? or how about  when they played the Steelers when they were robbed of that game? Or how about the Ravens who was one of your favorite teams coming into the season?? Vikings have won tough games and I say they are still able to do so. Dont count them out.






4. Well, we found Marvin Harrison
DProfessor: My daddy always told me to watch for them quiet cats, they are usually the craziest ones. Marvin is showing his true colors IF these details become true.


Ebizz: If details become true?? they have a man that said he was shot by Marvin Harrison. Then he was killed after coming out and saying that? A hell of a story to make up out of no where. It is what it is.





5. Restructure of the NBA
DProfessor: I'll take a revision to All-Star Weekend. Ray Allen wants 25% fan voting. Billups echoed that. I agree. There is no way in hell T-Mac should be allowed to play, let alone start in the game. My D-League player on NBA2K is averaging better numbers than him and AI. AI should bow down and let Rondo or DRose start if he gets the nod. AI can at least play a little bit. T-Mac is done.

Ebizz: The playoff system needs some retooling because the east only has to barely win and make the playoffs, while in the East an impressive 50 win season does not even guarantee you a spot?  I say put teams with the best scores vs. each other and let the teams with garbage records watch the competition from the sideline..



6. Big Mac with a side of "roids"
Ebizz: really i say f*** baseball but I must say the way these circumstances are being handled puzzles me.  The black unemployment rate is steady on the rise but yet we still are over saturated with sports icons that are built like pro wrestlers finally admitting what we already knew.  Lets focus on something important out here, and by the way FREE BARRY BONDS and let him play!!!!!!!!!!

DProfessor: What has yet to be said from Cardinal Nation is that we "forgive" McGwire is because he is white. White people stick together. They don't cross alliances, like Pimp C said, "If you was a cartoon character on your first album, you better be a cartoon character on your last one." I don't know what that has to do with anything, but I miss some Pimp C. Let Barry Bonds come out with a lame azz apology. You might as well shut down all the comment sections because they will be overwhelmed with hate.


7. Where should Toby Gerhart Go?
DProfessor: Gerhart is a late 1st Rounder to me unless he dazzles at the combine. He has to show he is sub 4.5 in the 40 and must kill the other RBs in bench presses. Teams will me ready to gobble him up...let's face it, how many good legitimate white rbs are there in the league?

Ebizz: I agree with you. Late first round, but yet a real steal.  I want to see him aside a fast back to add some balance  (ex: Tennessee, or Minnesota)
8. Vick to the Rams?
DProfessor: In the words of 8-5, "Child please." The day Vick signs with the Rams and doesn't get shot on site by John Wilkes Booth III, is the day I buy season tickets to the Dome. This is STL.
Ebizz: All the stuff you talking goes out the window when teams want to sell tickets. The fans will come out to see Vick play and he would have my full support as well.  If he came here and won the Rams about 8 games, people would be more than willing to put that dog-stuff behind them....Hell look at my man Kobe.


9. What happened to Steven A Smith?
DProfessor: According to CBeans, ESPN has a pecking order and Stephen A wasn't playing ball. You can catch him on Fox Sports and on his own site....HERE.  The fact of the matter is Stephen A kept it real and called a lot of cats out on the air. He always gave Skip the business too. Big up, rather be owner, than be owned.
Ebizz: Steve Smith we miss you and shouts out to Bill Walton. please come back 



10. Fantasy NBA Slam Dunk Contest Contestants
DProfessor: Can we get Shaq to rally the troops? I'm not too excited with Shannon Brown, Nasty Nate, and Gerald Wallace. Nice lineup but I won't miss any sleep over this one if I miss the festivities.

Ebizz: Nasty Nate Dogg!   How about JR Smith, Jamario Moon, LeBron James, Dwayne Wade, Vince Carter, and maybe Russell Westbrook. Can we get a little variety out here? But lets also take it back to the Jordan vs. Dominique rules, before the addition of the team crap.



Step your inteview game up before you get remixed too!!!!!