On the 7th Day of Xmas...

Who wants to get fucked up with me???
7 Alcohols you need to have on your shelf.

Disclaimer: I am by no way shape of form endorsing the mass consumption of alcohol. Alcohol is a dangerous drug. Yes a drug you dumb azz. It can kill you or cause you to do stupid things to other people that include but are not limited to cursing out your significant other, pissing on flowers in a cemetary, drunk driving, drunk driving on the wrong side of the road, falling asleep in the drive thru of White Castles, text the wrong person in your phone, and a host of other stupid things. Long story short, drink in moderation and please control your liquor.

7. Ciroc Peach. It ain't a party until somebody break out the Puffy shiny suit dance. The same goes for Ciroc. I prefer to sip the Peach with a splash of pineapple. Sometimes I go for lemonade, but the pineapple is better.
6. Avion Tequila. Marketed as the world's smoothest tequila. I just know it as the shit they was drinking on Entourage. I tried it, I liked it, I kept drinking it. I only tried the Silver but apparently there are like 3 flavors. I keep it in my comfort zone and stay on the Silver.
5. Patron Tequila. They don't carry the Avion everywhere, so I go with the 3rd most shouted out liquor in rap, Patron. Don't believe me, there is a song called Patron and Swag. Not lying. I'm not posting a link either though. You have to google me. Google me bish.
4. Rumchata. I know, yall like what kind of concoction is that. It is a liqueur or a cream. It is smooth like Edys ice cream though. The Slow CHURNED my dude.
3. Remy VSOP. Well known in the hood near you but did you know this is actually a Champagne Cognac. Think about that for a minute. A Champagne Cognac. I just thought I was drinking yac all this time and now I get to tell bishes I got that Champagne. Insert the Puffy dance again. Wait, hold the dances for my fav.
2. Jack Daniels Black. AKA Old Number 7. AKA JD. AKA That Get Right. Ok that last one was mine but the first two are marketed by the company. When a drink got two AKAs, you know you bets not be a rookie taking that to the head. Now its time to dance.

1. Hangar One Vodka. You want to impress your white friends, your boss, your bougie friends? Pop off on some of this.