On the 8th Day of Xmas...

I flip the script on thee....
The 8 things I hate most about Xmas time.

8. Spending money on gifts. Yep. Right off the bat. Let's be honest, it is a man-made holiday for spending. And it starts in November. All of these fake sales and inflated discounts. I was just at the store the week before and this crap was on sale, now you mark it up to regular prices and try to pull the sheets over my head with buy one get one free? C'mon son.
7. Bell ringers. I know its supposed to go to a good cause, but really, that shit is annoying. And they are everywhere like the people selling pixie sticks in the middle of the street.
6. The weather. If it wasn't bad enough in St. Louis, winters have been crazy as hell. Considering that it was 70 on Dec 1st, and the low has been 21, who knows what the hell we will have for the rest of the month. It might snow and be 75 the next day.
5. The fake salutations. Merry Xmas. Happy Holidays now since you don't want to offend people at work that don't celebrate Christmas. What happened to sending them to another room and making sure they don't get any cake?
4. Work Parties - Nothing exciting ever happens. Its not like happy hour where you go with the people that you actually like and people talk shit about the other people, especially the one person everybody hates. There's always one person everybody hates.
3. Social Media - I turn off every notification possible. I don't want to read all of the FB posts about merry xmas and what somebody got or who got engaged...blah blah blah. I don't mind the texts but hold the corny message attached to it. Just send me a stupid joke instead.
2. Family gatherings - Call me spoiled or whatnot, but you should not be allowed to host any gathering if you do not have at least a 40 inch flat screen Tv AND HD. Let me repeat - AND HD. If you only have the tv, the non HD ness of it will hurt my eyes and I will hate you for the rest of the week. HD TV has changed my life for the worse. That shit is addictive.

1. Christmas Music. I ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY HATE XMAS MUSIC. I would rather listen to this on repeat. All day long.